Purple Skins and Simpler Things

Bruised not battered. That's how I would describe what's left of my ego after you walk in. As If I have hit my shin and it hurts like hell, but I only get to see the bruise mark days later. Only then do I know the pain I inflicted on myself
Well you are no different. You come, you see, you point out one flaw or another, and only later do I see the effect.
So casual, but yet days later I bruise.
Purple skin blotching my pale legs.
And when I end up unshaved and in open toes- you see my lack of nail polish and stubble.
And I see you seeing me for the first time.
I am no longer the fairy tale girl with the sun kissed hair. I wear black and read mommy blogs. You see me and you see yourself. Only too far gone.
You tell me what you tell yourself. Only this time you speak out loud.
I take it.
Like I am told to. Even, often, and always when I have had enough.
But, you cant know that I have changed.
That underneath all this fat, is a woman rising.
I have lost weight and I will continue to lose weight.
Yes, it is hard to see...
But as I drop the pounds I kiss everyone of them goodbye.
I am never going to be this fat again! Never!
You see, I have been bruised. Not battered.
The mark was only temporarily showing on my skins.
I am still whole.
Watch me! You might never get a chance to see this clearly.