A Breath Of Diet Coke

You can't breath and then your breathing. Its that moment in between, when you know you should just hold on... and in.
...and out.
You shock me. Little pulses, so often- I feel beaten, when others think it can't really be that bad.
Oh, but it is.
Suck it in?
I wish I could.
I sometimes mind travel back to the beginning and I hate myself for letting myself go.
It was all for you.
Maybe not, but its easier to blame someone.
To point out and not in.
To find the time to catch my breath.
The one you took, take, keep on taking.
The takers.
I am your addiction.
You keep on coming back.
Like diet cokes.
....and I try, I really, really try.