Push Ups

There are rules and you break them into pieces all around me.
I step on fragments that used to be wholes, and hearts..
and now they are shreds, sharp and pointed-
your finger aims where my heart rips.

"How is your exercise going?" You ask,
and I want to stop and move backwards.
Gain my ten pounds back.
stop driving half hour to my trainers house.
start eating Reese pieces in buckets.

You make me want to give up. gain weight and
shed my shit in your most favorite places.

But, I wont. Not this time.
Because I have done that all before. for you.
for those like you,
and I am doing this now for me.
and those like me.

Your finger is so accusing and maddening.
I can't help but feel it throughout my day.

It finds me and points,
and picks.

me apart.